The [boring] life of a SAHM

My cousin Lindsey brought over some clothes her daughter has outgrown and MAN! Her baby girl is only 8 months old and she has a TON of clothes. These are all 3-6 months. She gave away all the 0-3 months before I knew I was having a girl! I was shocked! Of course one laundry basket full may not look like a lot but remember-baby clothes are TINY. There must be 100+ items here! Not to mention she also brought over 8 pairs of shoes (& 2 mismatches lol), 3 bassinet sheets & a sleep positioner. I am so excited!!

Okay. I'm super pissed. I don't know if its my crazy hormones or if I actually have a reason to be mad.

Several times we have told my MIL what we are naming this little girl. She has called/texted numerous times to ask us b/c she forgot and well, that alone annoys me. I think she should be able to remember her grand-daughters name. She remembers the middle name but not the first name.

Last time we were over at her house she called her GRACIE. I was like...what are you talking about?! She said "Oh isnt that what you are naming her?" I told her "No. We are naming her Adelyn, but will call her Addie for short." When we got home I was very irritated since we had told her about ten times what we were going to name her. I told Josh she had better not call her Grace again and if she is born and calls her Grace/Gracie I will come unglued.

Well this morning I wake up and check my cell phone. I have a text from her that reads:
"I need to know what day to take off in Sept. for THE GRACES birth. I need to put in now so I make sure I get off."

(I captilized the graces for emphasis but not Adelyn)

I replied "I don't know what day I am having ADELYN. My doctor won't tell me until September."

Aghhh!! I read that and said outloud..to nobody "Did she SERIOUSLY just call my daughter THE GRACES?!?!?!?! WTH?

Baby this week:
Your baby is now about 8.4 inches from crown to rump (21cm) and weighs about 1.2 pounds (530g).
Your baby's face and body now look more like a full-term baby. She now looks close to how she will look at birth.
The eyes, though they are still closed, are now close together on the front of the face and the ears are in their final position. Eyelashes are fairly well-developed and hair is growing on your baby's head.
Your baby's movements are becoming more restricted now as she fills up the uterus more. Cartwheels and somersaults inside the amniotic sac are no longer possible, but she can still hold the umbilical cord and touch and feel around her. Though your baby is already living in tight quarters in the amniotic sac, she will soon have even less room to move around.
Her vital organs are now quite mature. However, since the lungs are not yet fully formed, your baby would have breathing problems if born prematurely at this stage.
Your baby is becoming increasingly conscious of the world outside and may feel startled when you are startled.
Your baby may alternate between having very active and very calm periods.
Your baby may have facial expressions such as frowning, squinting and pursing of the lips.

Mommy this week:
The top of your uterus now reaches about 2 inches above your bellybutton.
You may be feeling Braxton Hicks contractions. These "practice" contractions pump blood to the uterus and prepare the body for labor.
You may continue to feel mood swings, fatigue and heartburn. You may sweat frequently as your body temperature is high during pregnancy.
You may have extra weight on your upper arms, shoulders and on your face due to water retention. Your weight gain may be causing bladder problems, sore feet and fatigue. To combat the fatigue and sore feet, wear comfortable shoes, put your feet up whenever you can and rest whenever possible.


**Wow! 1 more week til I'm 6 months!!**

How far along? 23 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: -5
Maternity clothes? Yep and lots of dresses a size or two bigger than I used to wear. :)
Stretch marks? Don't think I have any new ones but yes I definetly have alot of them!
Sleep: is wonderful...until I sleep for TOO long and wake up and everything is sore!!
Best moment this week: When DH felt the baby kick! He's felt it several times now! :)
Movement: Yep! Getting really strong now too-sometimes I can see my belly "jump"
Food cravings: Skittles
Gender: GIRL
Labor Signs: No.
Belly Button in or out? In
What I miss: Having energy
Weekly Wisdom: I dont feel like thinking of something ;)
Milestones: Hmm...does my belly jumping count? lol

Okay so a few weeks ago at Old Navy I found the CUTEST dress for Adelyn. When I saw it I immediatly thought "This is what she is going to wear when we dedicate her to Christ." It almost looks like a Christening dress but has gold stripes and well, its just adorable. Well today I was talking about it to my FIL and he told me to show it to him so we went to Old Navy and I showed it to him and he bought it for her!!! =D

Here is a link:

http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=47927&vid=1&pid=654602&scid=654602002&actFltr=true

I had to get it in size 0-3 months so I just hope it fits her! If she comes out like her brother she will definetly be able to fit it! LOL Braxton wore 0-3 mos clothes home from the hospital.

:) I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE THIS DRESS!

1.) We bought a new car! Well, not brand new. Just new to us. ha.ha. It's a 2000 Toyota 4runner and is in great condition. I love it! It's got a sunroof! Ahhh! We are both selling our cars. Josh has a 99 Dodge Ram and I have a 96 GMC Jimmy. My car is so unreliable. It only starts when it wants to, one door doesn't open , it randomly honks when you turn corners, I could go on and on. I actually feel bad selling it, it needs to be put out of its misery aka traded in as scrap metal! LOL

2.) We have a date set for the baby shower! July 11th! And we figured out a place! We're having it at the church, I asked Pastor Carole today and she's okay with it! Yay! Now I just have to figure out a time and get together with my Aunts so I can tell them who I want invited, what kind of cake, get invitations, etc etc. Only 7 more weeks! How crazy! I'll be 29 weeks and the day before the shower I am having my 4D scan! 2 things to look forward to in the next 2 months! =D

3.) We are hopefully getting a house soon. The company we were going to go through to get the loan called and told us a few ways to up our credit score high enough, and it will only take a couple weeks. So after that we are approved and can get a house! We already have one in mind and have even went to look at it and we LOVE it plus its in our price range. So, praying this all happens soon!

I'm so excited!

Also, not real exciting news but I had been wondering what I was going to do in church when Addie needed to eat (since I'll be breastfeeding.) I don't think I would feel comfortable doing it right there in front of everyone, and I don' want to make anyone uncomfortable so I asked Pastor Carole about it and she said I could do BF in her office. It's an open office just behind everybody so it would be private but I could still hear the sermon. I had been worried about that because I didn't want to spend 30 minutes or so in the bathroom feeding and missing out on the service so this works out great! Exciting for me! Lol

Now a bit of a rant..kinda.
I'm starting to feel bad about having a c-section. I feel like I'm missing out on so much. I feel like I'm being deprived of something. I'll never know what its like to have my water break, time contractions, rush to the hospital, all that stuff that comes with a vaginal delivery I will NEVER get to experience. I almost feel left out, or like a failure because my body couldn't do the right thing the first time. I was so hoping on a VBAC and it's really starting to bother me now that I can't have one.

Okay rant over.

DH FELT THE BABY KICK TONIGHT!!! =D

How far along? 22 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: -5 lbs total

Maternity clothes? Yep. I can still fit non maternity shirts in a size larger than I was but am definetly needing some NEW maternity pants. Shorts or capris I don't wanna waste money on jeans when I know I'm going to be soooo hot this summer! I actually need to get some more dresses!

Stretch marks? Yep

Sleep: Ohhh I have been sleeping soooo good!!

Best moment this week: My ultrasound-she was being so cute :)

Movement: Yep. Strong kicks, DH cant feel it yet but I'm sure he'll be able to soon! She loves music & icecream...always moves a TON after I eat icecream or listen to music. :)

Food cravings: McDonalds french fries....with lots of salt. =/ And orange juice I swear I could drink OJ all day everyday and not get tired of it. :)

Gender:

Labor Signs: No, but having some cramping and pressure from everything growing and stretching in that area.

Belly Button in or out? In

Gender? Ultrasound confirmed she's all girl!!

What I miss: Walking normal, and by normal I mean-not like a duck.

What I am looking forward to: My 4D ultrasound & baby shower. Just 8-9 weeks away!!!

Weekly Wisdom: Don't indulge in all of your cravings.

Milestones: Hmm not sure...

Waiting for mommys pop to come out-I love the look on his face :)

He had so much fun!

Leakey boobs.

Yep. About a week ago I noticed a little bit coming out, just a few drops but today, I was cleaning the bathtub and was leaning/putting pressure on my boobs when I started feeling wet spots, I look at my shirt and I have 2 medium sized round circles right where my nips are. CRAZY!!!

I really don't remember this happening so early with Braxton! I think I was 7, 8 months when I started leaking enough to leave circles on my shirts! What's even worse is when I saw them and then investigated by squeezing more out (sorry tmi! lol) I felt nauseous. I was seriously thinking "omg how gross" I am planning on breastfeeding so I feel almost guilty for thinking this was so disgusting. LOL

I hope this feeling goes away before my milk comes in.

I always thought Braxton would be potty trained before he turned 2.
Now, here we are at 2 years + 2 months and he's still not potty trained.
Some days I think we are close, and others I think "He's never going to get this!!!!"

During the day I either let him run around naked or just have him in "big boy" underwear. These were the 2 most common suggestions/tips I have gotten on potty training. Apparently when you let them run around naked and they go pee on themselves they realize they don't like being wet or having pee on them. (This is a messy method!) The big boy underwear is pretty much the same way-they notice they are wet and don't like it!

My experience with these methods so far:

Nakie method:
When I let Braxton run around naked and he starts to pee it doesn't bother him. He moves around so he makes a big mess all over the place or he trys to "aim" into a toy. Pretty much doesn't phase him at all. The worst part-when he goes poo-poo he comes and shows me, says "Ewwww" and wants to be cleaned up. Which I guess is better than when he goes poopoo in his diaper. He won't let me clean him up so I have to chase him down and race to get it all cleaned up and a new diaper on before I get kicked in the stomach.

Big Boy underwear method:
We've only used this method a few times. When he comes to me immediatly and says "wet" and wants to be cleaned up/dry right away. Luckily he's never gone #2 in them...yet.

I think our biggest problem right now is he needs to tell me BEFORE he goes potty, not after. Another thing-when I can tell he is pooping and I ask him if he is going poo he tells me no, so I go ahead and ask if he wants to go sit on the potty and he says no. Then a few minutes later I have to change him. Yet sometimes he will tell me he already went potty and tell me to "Look" and points to his butt so I check and theres nothing there.

Today he came to me and said "poo-poo" so I asked if he needed to go sit on the potty and he shook his head yes. So I sat him on the big potty (he HATES his potty chair-so we bought one of those toilet insert thingys that make the seat smaller.) He sat there a little bit, grinning, grabbed the toilet paper and wiped. Yet he didn't go potty. Then he wanted down so I set him down and asked if he was done. He said "no, poopoo" so I sat him back up there, he just played around and this continued for about ten minutes. Up, down, up, down. Now if we weren't potty training I would have just given up and walked away figuring he was just playing around, but I didn't want him to actually have to go and then end up going on the floor or something so I kept at it for awhile until it was obvious he wasnt even TRYING to go potty. So I put a pull up on him and he still hasn't went yet. It was so frustrating, mainly because I can't pick him up (I've been instructed not to by my doctor) yet I picked him up several times and set him on the potty and it hurtttttt! He's 40 lbs!!! That was tough before I was pregnant but now its awful trying to pick him up! Especially now that my hips/back/inner thighs hurt really bad.

Ahhh I wish potty training was easier!!

I wish all breakdowns of weeks=months in pregnancy were the same.
It's just confusing.

One website tells me I am 5.5 months, another tells me I'm starting my 6th month. Ugh! Why do they have to vary so much?! There should be just ONE way to figure it all up.

I would love to go by this:

http://baby2see.com/pregnancylength.html#weeks_into_months

Since according to their calender I am 6 months....but I don't think thats right. I consider myself 5.5 months.

Oh well!

Tonight we went to walmart to get a few things and while we were checking out the cashier asked me when I was due. I must admit, I was caught off-guard. I haven't heard this question much with this pregnancy. I told her I was due in September and she looked at my belly with wide eyes and said something "oh wow, are you sure there ain't two in there?" I just smiled and said "Yes, there's just one." If it weren't for the fact that EVERYBODY asked me this when I was pregnant with Braxton...I might have been annoyed, but I'm used to it. I was just thrilled that I looked pregnant! To me I just feel fat...it hasn't quite hit me that I have a baby bump yet. I was the same way with Braxton. I swore I was fat as a cow up til like 5-6 months then when I was standing in front of a mirror I noticed my huge pregnant belly and reality set in. Anyways, Josh stepped in and said we'll probably end up with a big baby because Braxton was 10 lbs 5 oz and her mouth dropped open. "I feel sorry for you. My babies were only 6 pounds and I thought I was gonna die!!" she said. I told her, its pretty rough but it's worth it!

Oh and if I look like I am carrying twins when I'm only pregnant with ONE I would hate to see me actually carrying twins. I'm sure I would be asked if I was having a whole litter.

Girly parts

Face-her mouth is open.

Todays ultrasound went great!

She's grown so much in just 6 weeks. Last time we saw her (16 wks) she weighed 6 ounces, now she is 15 ounces. Almost a full pound! She was so cute during the ultrasound. She sure is flexible! The whole time she had herself in these crazy positions. (Knees to nose, feet behind her head & holding them with her hands.) It was neat. I found out the woman who did my ultrasound was the same one who had to give me an u/s at 9 weeks with my 2nd pregnancy. I didn't even recognize her. She acted completely different. At my m/c ultrasound she wouldn't turn the screen, wouldn't say anything and thats how I knew it was bad. This time she was talkative, happy, etc. Adelyn didn't really want to show us what was inbetween her legs but when the tech shook my belly with the doppler thing she started kicking back and we were able to see between them and she is definetly all girl! She is still breech. I just had to ask even though it doesn't matter. Her heartrate was 136. We got lots of pictures & I'll post them in a new blog. It's just easier that way.

I also had my 22 week checkup. I think its crazy how little the doctor actually does. The nurse weighed me (I gained some weight! Whoo! I'm now -5 lbs!) I asked if the weight loss was anything to worry about she said nope some women just lose weight, and that I had a toddler to chase around so that helps. Then had to give a pee sample like always. They got new dixie cups. Haha They are sturdier and larger and not like the small 2-3 oz ones you give children. LOL
Then the nurse checked my BP & listened to Addies heartbeat-it was 148. Then told me the doctor would be in soon. 5-10 minutes later Dr. Kimmel came in and measured my belly-told me she'd see me in a month for my glucose screening and then after that she'd see my twice a month.

I asked her about the weird mucuslike discharge I had and she told me it's totally normal, just changing hormones which explains why I cry over nothing all the time now. I asked when she usually Schedules c-sections and I don't think she understood the question. She just told me she does them 7-10 days before my due date. I guess she thought I asked when shhe PERFORMS them. I dunno. Hopefully we can schedule it soon. I'm anxious to know when Adelyns bday will be, & I hope I get to choose the day. But according to her answer that means I will be having Addie sometime between Sept 14-17th give or take a few days. I really hope its not the 17th. There are soooo many family bdays already on that day.

Anyways-everything went great today. :)

Yep. I've got the "pregnancy waddle" now. It just started yesterday and I HATE IT!
My back/tailbone hurt sooooo bad and my hips feel like they are going to split. All that pain + my big ol' bellly=waddle waddle.

It's not pretty.

My FIL came by today and asked if Brax & I wanted to go get something to eat, so I agreed and asked if he could take me by hobby lobby while we were in town so I wouldnt have to go tonight. So he did and I was looking at some of the wooden stuff they have. I found a shelf thingy that I LOVE. It has a heart cut out and a peg that sticks out for hanging stuff and 2 small drawers. I also looked at the wooden letters they had. I walked out of that section and my FIL asked if I was going to get them, I said no (the letters were $3 each) that it was too expensive right now and that I would come back another time and get them. So he told me to get the letters & the shelf (which was $9) and that he would pay for them. Awesome! So I looked around and got a few more things I needed (stencils, brushes, ribbon) and went up to the register to check out. Well my FIL surprised me by paying for EVERYTHING. Added up to about $40.

I can't wait to start painting it all!!!

Ugh!

Polka Dotting is hard to do!! I attempted to free hand the circles on the bow holder I'm making and lets just say it wasn't pretty!! It looked awful so I had to paint over it with brown. I am definetly going to buy some stencils today or tomorrow.

On a completly different topic-my ultrasound is tomorrow!!

Tomorrow is going to be a BIG day!

We are leaving early so we can take Braxton to Mcdonalds for breakfast. Then we have my ultrasound at 11 AM. We'll probably grab some lunch somewhere, then go to my OBGYN appt at 1:30. After that we are taking Braxton bowling!! I am so excited! Josh has the entire day off so it will be soooo much fun! :D

Okay so a few days ago I blogged about that website headband holders and mentioned I really liked the holders but think I could make them myself? Well I really can because I found ALL the supplies the website used for theirs at WALMART!! Whoo!

Take a look:

http://www.hairbowholders.com/go/view.php?image=images/ElizabethM2Mpotterybarnlrg.jpg

Just one of many.

I found the large wooden piece with the metal thingys on the top (they are IDENTICAL) for $4. I paid $.050 for a bottle of brown paint and the same price for a bottle of pink paint. Bought 3 brushes for about $3 and 2 rolls of pink and brown polka dotted ribbon for $3 each. Total= about $14. I still need to buy some stencils but I couldn't find any I liked at walmart so I'll check hobby lobby. They shouldn't cost much. So lets just round up to 20 dollars to include the stencils.

This website is selling the hairbow holders for $70!!! I don't think that includes shipping either! & I'm making mine for $20. Crazy!

I can't wait to get started though!! After I finish this project I'm going to buy more paint and the wooden letters to spell out Adelyn and paint them polka dotted and hang them from ribbon.

I feel so crafty. :)

I officially can't stand DH's brother now. Before-I didn't like him but would still smile & say hi when I saw him. Not anymore. A little background info=Josh & Brandon (DHs bro) didn't really speak much before Braxton was born. For awhile I think they started to get along but it didn't last. Brandon is just plain RUDE. When Josh and I split up Brandon was constantly calling me a b*tch and other names, and though Josh was upset with me he wouldn't allow that and told Brandon to stop it. Well a bit later Josh and I got back together which I don't think he or his mom liked.

Joshs mom has several health conditions. Seems like she is always in the hospital for something. Well yesterday while Josh and I were enjoying a few hours alone while Braxton spent time with his cousin Brent, we were driving to Stillwater to rent a movie. Brandon texts Josh with a message that reads "Mom passed away." Josh handed me the phone with tears in his eyes. You could see he was absolutley heartbroken. He pulled over on the side of the road. Well I told him to call his brother to be sure because Brandon is sick enough to do that for "fun." So Josh called and asked if it was true. Brandon said "No. But I think its pretty crappy that you won't even come see the one woman who gave birth to you in the hospital....blah blah lots of cussing and name calling blah blah" The whole time I am telling Josh to hang up on him because I was sick of all this crap he pulls. We didn't even know she was in the hospital so how can we go see her?? I was soooo upset that Brandon did that. That is not appropriate EVER. He had Josh in tears over nothing! I'm still upset about it....another reason it pisses me off?

You won't believe this.

When Braxton was born, Brandon called Joshs dad and told him he was born still. WTH?!?! Braxton was born perfectly healthy so we were confused when Joshs dad called asking if Braxton was dead. Another thing-Brandon wasn't even there at the hospital with us. We just text him with all Braxtons details, (name, birth weight, length, time, etc) He is SICK! I think he needs psychiatric help.

I was so fuming mad yesterday I was shaking and ready to hurt him. Neither of my kids will be around their uncle Brandon until he learns to GROW UP! The last thing they need is Brandon telling them their mom or dad died when its not true. ugh!!

Well I didn't end up going to the ER.

I called my cousins mom who is a nurse and explained what was happening. She told me to keep an eye on it and to go to the ER to be checked if I have any more of it or if its blood tinged. So far I haven't had any more so just hoping it was some very weird CM. The only thing that worries me is Addies lack of movement. I felt her twice in a row at about 1130 or so yesterday morning and didn't feel her again until 10 pm last night. I tried everything. I drank orange juice, put the laptop on my belly (she hates that and will usually start trying to kick it off!) and even poked and prodded me belly and got no response. Man I wish I still had that doppler!!

I'm not sure what is going on. About 30 minutes ago I noticed some (sorry TMI ahead->) thick, clear snot-like discharge and there was quite a bit of it in large clumps. I'm not sure if this is normal discharge or mucus plug. Please pray that it's NOT the mucus plug. I'm scared and trying to decide if I should go to the ER or just wait for my appointment on Tuesday...I have felt the baby kick twice since all this happened so obviously she is okay. I just don't want it to be the mucus plug and end up going into preterm labor. I'll update if I decide to go to the ER. Grr I wish I had my drs number-I have no way to contact her except at her office. :((

Yes. Another pair of shoes for "Baby Sissy"

We went to walmart last night to get Braxton some "big boy underwear" (trying a new potty training thing) and like always I have to look at the baby stuff. What did I find?

A pair of adorable little boots on SALE! $2.50. Yep. TWO DOLLARS FIFTY CENTS. I couldn't leave them there. I got the last pair so I was stuck with a size 3. Maybe she'll have huge feet like her brother and can wear them in December when she is 3 months old. If not...maybe they will fit NEXT winter? I just love them!

Also got myself a very needed new bra-which would fit great if they didn't put extra padding in there-seriously-what woman who wears a D NEEDS extra padding?! Also got a new shirt, not maternity just a size bigger than what I usually wear. It fits nicely for now. :)

Boy, I love shoppin'!

I can't belive I will be entering my 3rd trimester NEXT MONTH!!! WOW! June 23rd! How crazy!!

I came across this website and I think I'm in love:

http://www.hairbowholders.com/

They have such CUTE hair stuff.
So far after browsing for 5 mins I already want to order:
-hair clippies(http://www.hairbowholders.com/go/view.php?image=images/INFANThair-Setof3-pinkbowsandpinkposhflower-lrg.jpg)
-a boutique hat (http://www.hairbowholders.com/go/view.php?image=images/KKlightpinkhatcreamandpinkflr-600.jpg)
-headband (http://www.hairbowholders.com/go/view.php?image=images/KKlightpinkgemheadband-600.jpg) & (http://www.hairbowholders.com/go/view.php?image=images/Crochet3inch-BabyPinkwith3largecrochetflowers-lrg.jpg)

I also LOVE their headband/clippy holders but I think I can make my own for much cheaper! :)
Ahhh! I cannot wait for this lil girl to get here!!!

No, I'm not TRYING to lose weight. The title makes it sound that way.
As you all probably know I have been losing weight this pregnancy and haven't gained any. So today I finally just googled "losing weight during pregnancy" and came across this q&a on Babycenter:

Q:Is it normal for a plus-size woman to lose weight during pregnancy without trying?I'm a plus-size woman and I've actually lost 10 pounds or so during my first trimester without trying — is this normal? Is it safe for my baby?

Expert Answer:It's not uncommon for overweight women to lose some weight during pregnancy or to have only a small weight gain during pregnancy. Sometimes women experience a temporary drop in weight in the first trimester, and the weight returns slowly over the next two trimesters. This shouldn't harm your baby as long as you're eating a nutritious diet.Weight loss may occur for various reasons. Part of the weight gain during pregnancy is to provide you with energy reserves in the form of stored fat, which you'll need during labor and nursing. But if you already have enough reserves, your body may adjust accordingly. The larger you are at conception, the less weight you may gain. (Read more about how much weight to gain during pregnancy.)Also, your body uses more calories during pregnancy, so if you don't change your diet, you'll probably end up losing some weight. During pregnancy, your body's priority is to provide your baby with nutrition, so as the calories you intake go toward his growth, your body may resort to using fat stores to keep you going — leading to weight loss.Additionally, many women lose weight in their first trimester thanks to the nausea of morning sickness, which causes them to lose their appetite.But don't worry too much about weight loss hurting your baby. Studies of women with severe nausea and vomiting in pregnancy have shown that babies do well despite maternal weight loss. A small 1998 study also showed that for obese pregnant women, weight loss or minimal weight gain during pregnancy didn't affect the pregnancy's outcome.Do tell your healthcare provider right away about any sudden, dramatic change in your weight — losing or gaining 10 pounds in a week, for example — as it may indicate an underlying problem.The best thing to do is eat a nutritious diet to provide the nutrients that your baby needs to grow and that you need to stay healthy, and don't let yourself go hungry.

The section that I italisized (sp??) makes SO much sense. I think I'll stop worrying now.

Obviously I have nothing to do with Braxton gone...1 hour til he's home! LOL Here are some pics of Addies closet and some clothes that I just LOVE:

Oh yes.
Cravings have officially started. I just don't understand why my body can't crave things that are GOOD for me! When I get a craving it's hard to substitute it with something else that is healthier. I want what I'm craving and I want it NOW. Lol
For example. Yesterday for lunch-what did I crave?
Lays Wavy Chips. Did I eat them?
Ohhh yes...and then I was sick of them.
Last night after dinner-craved chocolate icecream.
So what did I do?
I ate some yummy Rocky Road icecream.
Agghhhhhh!
Today for lunch-craved a calzone from the local pizza place.
(I used to work there years ago and never really cared for their food)
I have GOT to stop indulging in my cravings.
The worst is my most common craving-Mcdonalds french fries with tons of salt! *mouth watering*
Why can't my body crave veggies or fruit instead??
We absolutley never keep junk food in the house, and whaddya know-that's all I want!!!
& DH is so cute, one day we were at mcdonalds getting my yummy french fries and he watched me pour salt over them and asked "Won't that kill the baby?" I looked at him like he was nuts "no...." DH:"Oh, isn't that how they kill babies during an abortion? Inject salt in there?" and I explained they use a salt solution with a bunch of other stuff with it that burns the baby.....Then I reminded him of one of the ER doctors. I was going through a miscarriage and somehow the ER doctor and I got on the subject of salt and how I was craving salty stuff all the time and he told me and I quote "There is no such thing as too much salt when you're pregnant." (Thank God he's not a cardiologist)Hahaha so now he is my absolute favorite doctor.
I kinda got off subject....I'm good at that.
Anyways point of the blog= "I crave junk food=I eat junk food=thats nooooot good!" Oh but did addie love those chips. Once I started eating them she was bouncing all over the place...and after I ate the icecream-nothin'! You would think it would be the other way around.

Aghh there I go again-I'm just sooo bored! DS is with grandma until 4 so I have nothing to do! I miss him!!!! :(

On fertility friend I often browse other Due Date Clubs. (Especially whichever month is having their babies!!) Well I've been on the May boards most of the day looking at all the beautiful babies and reading birth stories and it just has me SO anxious. I know before I know it September will be here but it seems like it will never get here! Since I'm not going all the way to 40 weeks I have about 16-17 weeks left (so about 4 months) and it seems like FOREVER!! I just keep looking at all the baby stuff we have and thinking "Wow we're gonna have a baby in that eventually" and I want it to happen now! LOL

C'mon September!! Get here already!!

I had a weird dream last night.
I dreamt that I went to one of my dr appointments and the dr wanted to take the baby.
I was 32 weeks.
I thought she was crazy but hey she's the doc so I did what she said and came in the next morning for my csection.
It took forever for her to get there but the nurses prepped me for my csection (not doing anything right! I know b/c I remember from DS) and so I was wheeled to the surgery area and was told to climb up on the table. Well for some reason there was water all over the floor so I slipped and fell and couldn't get back up! They had to help me up and stick me on the table-all the while Josh is freaking out!
Well she got there and said something about an IV and stuck a tube in my mouth that was blowing air out...I took it out and said I was never given an IV. So She sticks a large needle through the skin on my wrist, like she was piercing it, removed the needle and stuck something in that. Weird. Then she brings me a big piece of chocolate cake, a dr pepper and some gum and told me to eat it all because I hadn't gained enough weight. After that I was given my epidural (through the IV in my hand!! Not my back!) and it didn't do anything. My dr told me she would pinch me with tweezers and if I felt it to tell her. Well I definetly felt it!! I had had enough!!! I asked the doctor "do you know how far along I am??" She replied "32 weeks 4 days" So I asked her why she was taking the baby so early and if she had even heard about the new study out that shows its unsafe to take babies before 39 weeks. She hadn't and then got mad and told me to stop playing doctor. Well obviously I had enough and was not going to go through with this at all so I left!

I have some really strange dreams when I am pregnant, especially when it comes to dreams about childbirth and being pregnant.

How far along? 21 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: Haha on mothers day we spent a few hours with my MIL and she has one of those doctor scales so I insisted on being weighed and it showed I was down 2 more lbs. (but I'm sure that will change next week at my appointment since in the last week I've had a pint of icecream and like 4 no bake cookies!!) So total weight gain/loss= negative 8 pounds
Maternity clothes?Yup and very stretchy pajama bottoms since I stay at home most days! :)
Stretch marks? I found some new ones!! A few new ones on my side and...a new belly one! It's very small and up high but still!! I didn't think I would get MORE on my stomach!
Sleep: Sucks. I want a new mattress!
Best moment this week: Just hanging out with my little family on mothers day
Movement: Oh yes. When DH and I went to the movies last weekend I got soooo into the movie I kinda..momentarily *forgot* I was pregnant, and of course that is when Addie chooses to kick harder than before and startle me!! Haha
Food cravings: Chocolatey stuff (I usually hate chocolatey stuff), orange juice (OMG I could drink a gallon at a time I can't get enough!), and Mcdonalds french fries. Then last night I was reaaaaally craving Texas Roadhouse bread & butter. YUMM!
Gender: Girl but I'm sooo scared our ultrasound will show a boy even though we were told its 100% GIRL! I'm just in disbelief that things are actually going the way I want I think.
Labor Signs: No
Belly Button in or out? In but getting shallower and flatter
What I miss: Having energy...where is the 2nd trimester "burst of energy" I had with DS?? Eh?
What I am looking forward to: My Ultrasound and OB appointment==5 more days!
Weekly Wisdom: Rest when you feel you need to. It's good to have at least a 20 minute break a day...just laying around relaxing and bonding with baby!
Milestones: I'm not sure if I've hit any this week...

Baby this week:

Your baby measures about 7.6 inches (19cm) from crown to rump and weighs about 12.25 ounces (350g).
Eyebrows have developed.
His digestive system now functions in a rudimentary manner. Undigested amniotic fluid passes into his bowel which he will eventually excrete after birth. Your baby can suck and swallow and may even suck his thumb.
Your baby's senses are developing, especially his sense of touch. He can feel his face and stroke his arms and legs.

Mommy this week:

Your blood volume keeps increasing to meet the increasing demands of your pregnancy. Most of the increased blood volume is comprised of plasma, the liquid part of your blood. You may see small dilated blood vessels on your face, and your gums may be swollen due to pregnancy hormones that increase blood flow. This may also cause hemorrhoids.
While you may still be experiencing pregnancy symptoms such as back pain, round ligament pain, itchiness and some fatigue, this is the stage of pregnancy that most women enjoy the most. You are still able to move about comfortably, yet the nausea of early pregnancy has usually passed. You may also enjoy the attention that you are getting as your belly can no longer hide. By the end of pregnancy, you'll probably wish people would stop commenting!

I just cannot believe I've made it this far. I'm in disbelief sometimes. I never thought this pregnancy would progress past 9 weeks and here I am at 21 weeks!! I've got so much exciting stuff coming up I can't wait! 8 weeks until my baby shower, 9 weeks until my 3D/4D ultrasound! Ahhh!

I'm starting to notice some "2nd tri" symptoms. I've been getting sooo many headaches! :( I have one pretty much all day and it makes it impossible to get up and do anything! When I stand my head feels like its going to explode and I can feel the blood pumping in my skull. Ugh! And my skin! Don't even get me started on my skin!! With Braxton I had this pretty glow and I expected that again...but nope. My skin is dry, dull, and I'm getting acne! I woke up this morning and saw about 5-6 small pimples and freaked out! I've got a couple large one's now too! They just come out of no where and they are sore/painful. :(( Oh well! Addies been moving alot more now. The other night Josh and I went to a movie and I was sitting there, really getting into the movie when she kicked me really hard and I must admit...I was startled! Sometimes I get so caught up in things like movies that I momentarily forget that I have a tiny person in there and so those kicks kind of freak me out a bit! Haha! I just wish Josh could feel it now though! He's been trying the last few nights but no luck!

6 more days until my next OB appt & ULTRASOUND! I'm so excited to see how much she has grown in 6 weeks! =D

I'm so stressed out.

There are 2 things that have really been bothering me that I have no control over.

1. I blogged awhile back saying my parents were getting back together and my mom moved back in with my dad. Well the past few months it's pretty obvious that they aren't working things out. Mom just moved back in because she ran out of options and had no where to live. She told dad she wanted to work things out but she won't spend time with him, she's never home and it's driving daddy crazy. She stays out all night going to bars and hanging out with friends. She's obsessed with my 17 year old brother and wants to be just like him. She actually thinks that when they go out that people think she is his sister. Ha. It's just tearing me up. She's seeing four different men right now and has gotten into drugs. She wants nothing to do with me anymore because I'm not "cool" enough-oh wait, that just means I'm responsible! On mothers day she worked until 5, got off for 2 hours and went to the familiy bbq my aunt threw and then went back to work at 7. I tried to talk to her but she wanted nothing to do with me. I would sit next to her and she would find an excuse to get up. I would talk and she would practically ignore me or start up a convo with someone else. She just wanted to hang out with my teenage cousins. I don't know how much more of this I can handle. When Josh and I were TTC she would always tell me to "hurry up and give her another grandbaby" and then the month we got pregnant she left dad and wanted nothing to do with anyone. I speak to her 1-2 times a month and see her about once a month. She's always working during the day and bar-hopping at night. She never sees Braxton and then wonders why he wants nothing to do with her when she does. She calls my cousin Kelsey her daughter and Kelseys son, her grandson. She sees them often, texts Kelsey everyday.
I'm just so sick of feeling this way and feeling this hatred/dislike for my own mother. I want my mom back. I'm sick of her trying to be a teenager when she should be a grandmother!

Thing #2...We've been trying to get a house for a long time, but the town we live in is very expensive to live in so we hardly ever find a house we can afford. Most houses for sale here are either 1.)Too small and in terrible shape yet cheap or 2.)Nice houses but are anywhere from $100,000+ We can't find a house inbetween. So we started looking at houses in the towns around us. Well we found one we love, 3 bed and 1 bath, very nice house and in our price range and its also very close to my family. So we called the loan co. and they told us our credit score is 1 point short. If we had just 1 more point we would qualify for the loan. He told us to get that 1 point we could open up a credit card and make on-time payments. Well, we tried that and we can't get a credit card because of our credit score. So this is feeling VERY impossible and stressing me out. I'm sick of wasting money on renting and around here it's impossible to find a house for rent that's decently priced. We live in a 2 bed 2 bath house and pay $350 and this is the cheapest option in Perkins. Others go from 500-1000 a month and we just can't afford that right now. I'm sure if I worked we could but I just don't want to put Braxton (and Addie) in daycare. I'm kinda overprotective, I don't trust anyone. I just really want Addie to have her own room so we don't have to share one. I just want us to OWN our own house so we don't have to waste money on renting. It's just so hard...I feel like we are NEVER going to get a house of our own. :(

Ughhh...I think I need a big bowl of icecream.